Being an artist has nothing to do with conforming to the current idiotic ways of society. Doing so, in hopes that someone will pay you far less than you're worth. Enslaving you in a lifetime of producing absolute rubbish. Bullshit you despise yourself for creating.
I deserve better than this. The world around me deserves better than this too. Someday, an individual, or group of individuals, will finally have the courage to support my many talents and skills. Talents and skills that have already been recognized by many. Some of those who've recognized these things in me were too shallow and self absorbed to admit I have them. Confident people like myself scare arrogant cowards like them.
Many famous Country Music stars have faced and overcome extreme levels of emotional and physical trauma. Even my own hero Johnny Cash battled demons his entire life. I now recognize I've made too much of a fantasy out of his life. Most particularly his relationship with June Carter.
There's no better Country Music star than a tortured soul. I'm definitely in good company there.
I'm trying to stop forcing myself to live a perfect life. It's not possible. Particularly not when you've endured a life like mine. It's ok not to be enough in the minds of others. I try to remind myself of that about a million times a day.
Haters always gonna hate.
I'm sure I won't be accepted by the current Country Music scene. And I'm ok with that. I don't give a fuck about country clubs anyway. If you don't accept me for who I am. Kindly place a splintery broomstick up your ass and pull it in and out slowly. Please make sure you repeat this process multiple times over.
I don't need the Grand Ol' Opry to recognize me to bring me joy. I just need to be happy with man I stare at in my reflection everyday. The only person who's soul I'm in control of, no one else's. If I can accomplish this for the rest of my life, if I can sleep at night knowing I'm doing my best, even if my best isn't good enough... I've done everything I can do.
Besides, I'll be creating my own fan base. Real people who understand what struggle means. People who desperately need someone positive to look towards in these tumultuous times. Just like Freddie Mercury, I'm here for those misfits and outcasts in the back of the room. The ones who don't think anyone gives a shit about em. The ones who barely hold onto their lives, moment by moment, day by day.
People like me.
I'm really happy to have settled in as a Country singer. It's a very comfortable fit for me right now. Particularly when bringing my own flair to the genre Outlaw Country. I'm really glad that County Music is where my new life begins. I couldn't be more proud to represent the many icons who've come before me in this genre.
Country Music, like the Blues, is all about overcoming adversity. Not letting adversity overcome you. I think this message of Country Music has been allowed to be left behind. That ain't right. Allowing this strong message from Country Music to become lost is an injustice. To the fans and to those heroes who blazed the trail before me. It's time for someone to blaze that trail once again. To once again, reopen the truth in Country Music.
I'm more than happy to be that person.
Music is just as much a part of me as my own flesh and blood are. It's always been the beat within my heart that's kept me alive. I'm very grateful for my own heroes of all genres, no matter how flawed they were/are. I'm grateful to be one of the next in their lineage of hope.
Cause that's what the right music performed by the right people provides for fans.
Hope for their own futures.
I'm so honored to be able to bring my own unique Country Music sounds to the world someday. I'm proud to be a model for other men, young and old. True men who struggle to fit in with the little boy idiots who surround them. Most of us are actual men controlled by idiots who wear diapers under their big boy clothes. Those infants who are always pretending, well, they are actually an extremely small group of assholes.
I'm no fuckin angel, nor will I ever say that I am. Nor will I ever be an angel. Besides, it's no fun to try anyway ; ) I'm a damaged human being who's always tried to be my best. And I'm still trying to believe that my best is good enough. Based on my heroes, this is a battle I'll have for the rest of my life. I'm slowly getting used to, and accepting of, this concept.
I've been chuckling to myself a lot. I'm probably the first major music star who'll be publicly crucified for speaking out against drug and alcohol abuse.
Crazy world we live in these days. One controlled by the angry, alcoholic and drug addict minority.
Gotta love those spoiled rotten rich kids.
Or not ; )
Stupid is as stupid does.
No one will ever convince me that it's the poor and the homeless who are keeping several multi billion dollar, worldwide industries afloat.
While I now truthfully understand there is no "God" or "Devil" and that Jesus Christ was just a man like me...
I also understand that there is something out there, inside each one of us. It actually is us and nothing else. Hard to explain. English is the only language I currently know how to speak or write. And English is a bastard language. A language clearly created by narcissists. There are too many rules. Many of those rules contradict themselves. Plus. There's no simple way to explain the truth through the English language.
Essentially. This thing that is really simply you and simply me. Not a separate entity from any of us. Well. It's too simple for me to explain it to you. There are no words in the English language that allow me to.
However. This entity, which is only you and I working together, nothing else. It wants all of us to do well in our lives. It wants us to succeed at our wildest dreams.
The only opposing force stopping us in these achievements is fear.
Fear actually isn't real. It's purely a figment of anyone's imagination. Fear is an emotion that can be overcome.
None of us is our worst enemy. We all react to the fear a very small group of angry and passive aggressive narcissists use against us. Their purpose is to use fear to divide us and weaken us. This way they can more easily conquer us.
So it is only in unifying together that we can conquer fear. Staying divided, as we've been told to do, only allows fear to continue to win against us.
I recognize that I am a vessel of sorts for the creative things I make. However, it is not that simple. I cannot be just a vessel alone. I must live my life and not be afraid to do so. The truth of the life I've lived, and the life I continue living... well, that is actually what allows me to create such amazing and wonderful art.